~~Really wish to hav someone to hug! but i guess i'll stick to bolster for now :'(

2010-05-13T08:36:00.000-07:00

Moving On ^^
Nafra ended. Hmm, quite sastified with my result. I did impove on my pull ups since sec 4 though i didnt train my arms -.- Did 11 previous 8. Same for standing boardjump, 270 last time and nw 277. Lastly, most glad that i've improve tremendously on sit and reach, from 30- 40 range, and now 54. So... i guess it's full marks and i've gotten into hall of fame ^^

stay fit and healthy~~

2010-04-29T01:23:00.000-07:00

wow... it has been so long since i blogged. Just wannted to post abt something usual today. While i was walking in jp, there's this model consultant - john, who appoached me. Asked whether i'm interested to be a model and stuff... caz they're recuiting actors, tv commercials and things like that...
I told him that i wasnt really interested to be a model, but he kept saying tis and tat... he gave me his name card and the company 1, donno wad "i models holding international..." and lols -.-''' gave him my no. for future contact... I guess i'll hav to reject him again bah.
Hais~~ weird experiences.

~~Really wish to hav someone to hug! but i guess i'll stick to bolster for now :'(

2010-04-07T06:51:00.000-07:00

Why is my feeling always contradicting the actions that i wan?

Somedays, I've tot of forgetting u, tellin my ownself countless and multiple amt of times, repenting myself. Then Sometimes, i wonder if i should just start afresh, get into a relation, which will be my first one. This tot had been in my mind so long, yet till now, i wasnt able to accept one.

For me, love is perfect. One and only is sufficient for my this life, everlasting. I know i'll be really devoted... tats where the fear gets into me. Frighten tat once i get into my relation, i'll never ever think of u again... I find it only rite to forget my old feelin first be4 engaging into a new one. But there's this fear of losin my feelings for u, my mind seems wanting to hold onto it. couldnt shake it off, Arghh... i guess tat obsession, too overwhelming. seriously, i do agree we aint really tat close, but tat kind of weird feelin is just there.

I tot of reasons why should i even post this, and just found out tat i actually, really wanted her to know - 'how i feel for u', by readin these... Ironically i'm pretty sure tat she will nv read my blog as how i hoped for. wad a gutless guy i am... aint daring enough to tell it straight in her face. Dreamt for best to come, but i know it wouldnt come close, as i've nv done my part. utterly stupid... hah.
Hey, no point keeping it hidden anymore... The fact is still just there, tat i still havnt gotten over her. And i feel that it's only rite for all ppl to know, tat i'm still in love wif her 'a girl i loved'. I mustn't let all havin hopes of being wif me, or giving them any false hope. I'm nt great enough for them to wait for me as how i'll continue to wait for her. I'm so damn sorry... I love her... weirdly. So, to anyone, lets just be frens :D i'm fine making frens wif anyone... but just frens! HAHA :P

I swear, u're truly a beaut... genuine feelings just for u. ~~~

2010-04-05T06:41:00.000-07:00

Getting out of my emotional zone, skool really help big time. Though some part of me still has the urge to feel, there're frens who will always be beside me. I thank them for making me feel some sort better as they did their best to bring in new topic to divert my attention :D And Test too, doing those really motivates me to strive harder and be hungry for results! Same goes for my passion in basketball. Yeah, i'll try not to be so low in mood and be very ready for the fun and excitment coming in the future :)
Better will come~~

starting a fresh!

2010-03-30T11:18:00.000-07:00

being unreasonable... we do chat here and there, alittle some times. but if u ask me, i really dont know alot abt u. As in, i didnt understand u so well till those that can start a relation. I guess i havnt really tell u how i feel for u, but actually... thinkin much, i suddenly felt that i'm in no position to say those words to u in the first place. I should have know u more, talk to u every often, chat, text u, try to understand in depth - who u are and wad are ur likes and dislikes. Since i only moderately pass in those aspects, i really shouldn't be even talking abt being wif u... hahas such unreasonable and selfish ideas. Expecting a person to love u without making much effort to get together in the first place? Hah....

In the end, just felt that it's only right not to be too greedy and take another step forward, i guess... being frens might really be a much better choice?

So, i think i'll put an end to my misery hahas, it is only right to respect u of ur life :D And also i would wan to change my previous quote to 'never let love lies in fate, u gotta be hungry for it'.

hahas!

Ok! I swear i'll never ever use the 3 majestic words like a selfish and unreasonable person ever again, but keeping it in my heart first until i've learn and understand much of the person i wanted to get my relations with - that is, to be able to chat with that person everyday, anytime, anywhere, anywhen and now. And love the person from head to toe, inclusive of the heart and mind.

Start a fresh now! :D the next person who gets in my mind, u're as good as dead xD

hey! thx a thousand million for ur cakes, i appreciate it alot :D though i've eaten lots days be4. HAhAs. I promise to get something for ur Birthday, but nt something that's with meanings. The next time u see me, i wont be habouring any weird ideas abt u anymore, rest assure :D Stay as good frens forever in this life!

2010-03-28T05:25:00.000-07:00

plain and dull... days past. my heart seems kindof empty - partically. Watchin frens and mates having their beautiful and complete life makes me jealous alittle. Admire maybe :D
Some says their life are being limited and actions are restricted... Still, i envy them, to be able to share secrets and joys with each other. Their "tank" were fully filled to the brim. Mine's half maybe? Opportunities are out there, just tat there's things i'm still unable to forget. I guess i could be the one and only stupiest guy, who could get relationships but doesnt wan it... hah -.-''
when will i forget? then i'll be able to find my next half... I'm waiting, till one day i wake up from a long slumber - tat wasnt a necessary one in the first place.
Redundant love? should i start a fresh? Dilemma

2010-03-27T07:43:00.001-07:00

Glad tat i'm finally 17... hmms, guess i cant say tat i'm young anymore. hahas... life will get better and better for me. Trust it.

2010-03-20T06:29:00.000-07:00

Holiday gonna pass soon. Frens gonna start skoolin 2. I guess after tat, less opportunity to meet one another :(
Anw, i seems to look forward to skooling days, made some frens after malaysia kotta tinggy trip :D and Glad tat the teams bond is stronger now. [ guys remember, anger can nv bring a winning game :D ] Skools goin to be tougher but easier as well, wif frens :) Sooo, monday, here i come :D
Never look back~~

Seems tat fate just doesnt bring us tgt... hate myself for nt knwin u sooner. seriously. But this life, this game, i've decided to play on. Knowin tat it's nt very possibly we be tgt, i just hope tat after u start skoolin, u'll still remember me, a fren of ur. Lets stay in touch whenever possible... still lov u for now, but never forever...

2010-03-11T08:29:00.001-08:00

my heart cant deny, to be wif u...

2010-03-08T06:34:00.000-08:00

hahas, countable days... i'm kind of sian diao now -.-
today, went to Bk wif Mi bbteam. Took train back. Then donno y walk to bus 174 and took escalator... took abnormal way back to jp instead of my home. Hmm i realise tat sayin shun lu back home is just an excuse. I guess i really m an idiot... Just wanna see her. Waving hi, seein a smile on her face - that moment was simpily, cant discribe wif words. However, thats for shortwhile, know is nt everlasting. It's nv enough. I'm selfish, yes, i want her all by my side, all the time, if i could.
now, i'm really missin u. luvu2much~

2010-03-05T07:27:00.000-08:00

yay, big achievements! Did well for sports day. Well, wad a tiring day today... tmr still neds go skoolin -.-
gtg take a rest :D
idkwhybutistillloveu~

2010-03-02T08:10:00.000-08:00

seeing u might be enough. i guess i still feels for u. lots. wouldn't take that path if it isnt u...
forgettin is harder than rememberin~

2010-03-01T08:17:00.000-08:00

heyhey, long time bo blog ;D hmm, anw today gonna talk abt studies. Umm first thing first, kinda regret not strivin hard enough for my O's. I guess studies, really needs to hav an interest and real commitment to it. I think teacher's really really really, really really and really and really [sry for the emphersis] plays a huge role in makin lazy students lik me for instance, to strive hard. I'm v glad that i'm in a class wif all good teachers hahas, who motivates me real lots and implies interest of studies in me. Umm, i'm nt sayin my teacher in sec skools sucks, nor i'm pointin that they dont make me lik studies. Even now, i still feels that most, infact 99% of my teachers are v efficient. i guess it's just that i'm nt workin hard enough. Trust me, i've nv blame a teacher for my results. caz i know tat they did their best, and problems lies in me nt them. Anw, i'll take this opportunity to thank my teachers, be it previously or present'ly' or currently i should say. Thx alot and a million. I'll nv do badly for my studies ever again, that i promise myself.

2010-02-25T06:41:00.000-08:00

Hey, today's funny hahas. Ok trouble first, Gp essay, dead meat. Hope i'll improve after Tcher marked and correct me. Hmm Pe in mornin is great, with 10a1 class. 8 rounds for start as it's our first actual Pe lesson. After skool, went to run another 10 rounds, infact it's 8 only -.- y count for me -.- make me happy for nthing. Then, decided to tell the teacher in charge for Student C, that i'hav already been selected as Sports Leader, however, after miss zhang's logical explaination, i reluctantly accepted to go for the interview. Just answer any wadever Qn they asked. Then after the interview, requested to hav a day more to decide which of the council i'm more interested in. Home tutor [form T] was kind to call me and share his thoughts/ point of view abt havin additional CCA. I really appreciate it, but i guess i would wanna try, for my testimonial. So, thx for ur advice anw.
Ok, went Queensway with my gd fren, hahas. she needs her track shoe, so brought her go there see see loh. Aiyo... girls arh... hahas. Ok walk back quite a long distance and sweat quite abit. I guess it's only right to send her back home rite? as she accompany me for the run earlier and also, she's a girl soo hahas, safety mah. yea, long walk har! cfm lose weight le xD. Ok she went home and i took 198 back homme. then, when reach jp, happily carry my bag, left the bus and head straight home. Ok Reach Home put down my bag to take my shoe out, just thought of my nike white shoe bag -.- o die my track shoe. Dash back jp interchange Hahas lucky gt back my shoe bag man, the bus driver as well as those bus assitant were excellent, i should say. They did their very best to find that shoe bag back for me. Hahas found, and thx them lots. Thx again man! i guess in this world, there's still kind and helpful ppl.
Student C Sport C... hais... i feel bad for wad i've done. Guility conscious~ I better starts to learn to think be4 cfming things.

2010-02-24T08:17:00.000-08:00

Ok, doin a 400x4 relay, 800m and 1500m long dist during sports day next week or so? Also, basketball as well as netball with wen jin and sheng jie. Lets work hard towards it. Self torturing starts tmr. Never will i let Garnet down ^^
Pe is gonna be fun with class 10b2 :D Math lesson and class is gonna be enjoyable too. Lastly Math lecture will be the best of all. Hahas!
Onwards and stay forefront~ no goin back.

2010-02-23T08:22:00.000-08:00

hey, u told me to follo my heart... i guess my answer is u, if u wan the truth. i really wanted to tell u that, no matter wad changes, i still love u. Take today as an example, the steps i took towards u, i almost wanted, wanted to take and hold ur hand, and say that i really really needs u to be a part of my life... but then, that last step towards u, i took back myself, that saddeness, that i felt of bein no point anymore, i decided nt to say those precious words. i guess i 'll save it, caz i dont wanna let u feel guility anymore. I realised that i'm too selfish before - indirectly, that i nv thought of how u feel. u do hav ur life, and the ideas u wan for ur life, therefore, i mustnt be such a jerk and interfear ur life. i love u and i respects really u. Takin the first step to tell me things shows that u're no longer lik before, u've improved, matured and u are no longer a lousy person u use to say urself [though u nv were in my mind].
I really love u, so much, so much tht nth can ever describe it. I find myself funny to sutter my words in front of u, the racin heart beat down with rhythm till the blood around my whole body. but i guess, we aint meant to for each other, inifnite reasons pulled us apart.
If one day, that god stop playing with me, when u finally accepted me, i will want to be with u for sure... but that will be if i'm still unattached.
Treading between water... move on. Life is such a puzzle~

2010-02-22T05:32:00.000-08:00

Hahas a girl lend me her umbrella earlier during the heavy downpour. I asked her if her frens needs it first, but then they said it's ok. Though i got a weird feelin that they might needs it but i guess i took her umbrella as she seems to be a very kind girl and rejectin her request in front of her frens might make her feel awkward hahas. Though in the end i lend the umbrella to krystal and her fren jane [ as they mght need it more than me, caz i' a boy ] i guess i'll go to her class tmr to return her, her item, as well as a big thank u. Anw thinkin back, it was lik the same previous thing happen be4 hahas.
Skool was as usual, fun interesting and accomplishable. Haha so happy of my POA class, seems that 3yrs gonna be a real deal :D I guess god really aint that bad, i always thought god was always againsting me - just took back my wrongly words. Hope god giv me even more interesting life, that i could even forget who i really am.
Lovee, i guess it really isn't a time for me, as i wont be giving it all to who i am with for now and i'll feel guility abt it. Still needs time, i guess, when i finally ready, i'll go for it. I tell myself that it's allrite to be sad and empty for sometime, but i promise, to myself, that i aint stayin stadnent lik a dummy for ever. I'll just get one who's better, though it's gonna be hard, but then i'll make it, caz unlike be4, i gotten myself something, something that turns me into a new person.

To- the one i truly love.
i guess u even know of my blog so i find safe to write things here. it isnt alot, so i guess even if any1 reads it, it's still ok. i'm posting it here caz i dont wan to forget wad i say today, now, i wanna serve this as a memory, a good one. Maybe next time, i could be proud to tell u that i really love u before, that time - this time, as i wish to remember the feelings for u.
I guess we really aint mend for each other as we're very different. Yes, i do agree to u that to some extent we did think the same, eternity love or wadever so... but then, maybe it's smthing that keeps us distant. Ok, now abt myself and my weakness. I find myself so fkin shit, when i couldnt bring myself to tell u how i really felt. I cant express my inner self to u. i couldnt. wadever u we chat be4, no matter how stupid i felt, i just let it go... i pretend being happy in front of u, but i guess i'm just plain stupid. The real reason y i didnt start any relation was all, becaz i find it hard to forget u. I donno wtf why i feel this way though it's true that i dont know u well, the time we spend were minimal, but then, some part of me still hav u, and i know it. I do ask myself often, hey y am i still thinkin of u when theres so much wonderful ppl out here? this i do hav to agree that there's some really gd ones that i've seen. I guess i do wan to know them hahas, u know befriend with them.
Ok enough said, i'll move on. I use my next one month to socialise as well as recoving the my sadness tank and filling it up to brim with happiness. I promise, after one month's time, i'll be able to take u as a gd fren, and nt some lovely dovy. Then, I'll start my engine, to find my near perfect soulmate, which will be much better of course, i guess hahas, as i might hav some in my mind. However, wadever we changed, Do stay in touch and dont forget me, as i'll nv forget u, for makin me do those handycraft tat i dont enjoy. Jk only Hahas as it's my own stupid childish idea i think :P I hope i've stop u from feeling guility after now.
Wish u well, ur best. I will nv shred tears after this, i swear, so lets move on together.
See each other often in future, as frens - forever and never changing.

2010-02-19T07:54:00.000-08:00

hmm, seem that many ppl misunderstood wad i post eariler... As i was rushin things just now to make a short post be4 goin My sec skool form T house warmin, that post gave the wrong meanin, i guess, after readin it again myself 2. Wad i really meant was that, there really lots of ppl out there thats better than wad we can expect. As in, there ppl with absolute gd character... wadever positive things lah hahas. Yes this i really wad i felt, yet i forgot to mention abt my past ppl's, as it then seems lik i'm sayin those past fren bad -.-
Wad i can really say to amend my previous post was, frens that i've made previously are gd obviously! I dont make fren that sucks at their ways. And 1 thing to mention is, i really dont mind sayin it, i still feel for some1, though i told some of my frens that i'll forget her, but i cant be fast at that, which is really why till now i havnt even start any relation, still an "unwanted single" hahas. I really cant bottle up this fact thus putting it out here though i didnt really wanted to at first. I really do need some1, to speak to... some1 willin to listen and allow me to speak out my mind, to get hell lot better, caz the girl i love, will nv know how i feel -as 1 part is i'm such a coward... fearin abt things that i cant really disclose, but the reason y i dont intend to speak to her.
Only way to lessen my agony, move onwards and be happy towards life everynow and then.
one last thing, if i ever confess, it shows that u're the best in my mind, as i nv regret my choice of u~ [talkin to myself hahas]

2010-02-19T03:01:00.000-08:00

These few days, after pondering much, i figure out that it might be a blessing in disguise for me, to nv get into love. Caz now that i'm more expose to more ppl in these world, i guess that if i was in relationship before and till now, i might, i dont wanna say, but, i might really really change my mind, as better girls just come flowing. Hmm i guess, i have to really stop believeing too much in loving at first sight as it might nt be very accurate. wad is more assuring for an everlasting love - that i wanted, was to start communicating with the girl i am fond of but still unsure abt her. Then slowly, learn abt her, know if she was a gd or bad girl, know more abt her, be closer to her, and share troubles, different points of views abt life and stuffs, listen to her trouble, share mines too. After all this, i call it still, As good frens. If i'm really really sure that i still love her and will continue love her forever, i'll then start working more into getting more closer, nt as in physically or wadever, but heart and feeling. Thats then, i'm sure i'll get eternity love and also a true soulpartner for the rest of my happy life HAHAS :D

There's always better girls out there [character]/ everything, i finally understand nt to rush things ;D
When sayin I love u, that girl must be the one and only - best to me. ^^

2010-02-17T03:40:00.000-08:00

Hey hey, today was kindof a ^^ to me lols. ok lets start with skooling. Went skool today, was supposed to bring my passport to zap a copy in skool for my cca cher. But then, when i was goin to leave, i put my passport down and took my keys on the table to open my door... tada! Felt guility deleyin my teacher in the admin stuff for the oversea trip -.- but nvm, given grant to bring it by tmr caz some mates didnt bring it 2 :P

Ok! why did i post today? caz, today is the day i get a home room [home class] and it's the first day for me to see my 3yr classmates. Ok lets talk abt going into the class room. me and my fren SJ reached the class on time, some of the few early 1 though. So we waited there for awhile, curiously lookin around to see the students in the class. It was 8.50 then, our home tutor was late by 5 mins and when he came in... Me and SJ giv out a sigh. I crack out a humour "Hias, sian la so suay, class no chio bu -.- 3 yrs die liao." SJ corrected me, " hey, think of the bright side mah, at least we can concentrate more on our studies." "yeah quite true... arbo we opt to change class?" he agreed and both of us made a sian expression. Just then, wads so funny is that the timing really damn zhun, a girl, i should say, very gd 1, walked pass. "Wa seh, chio bu lai liao," he whispered to me. "Aiyo she so chio cfm nt our class de la -.-," i replied. She walked away, then we both sigh again. Thenn, the timing so Zhun again, must be god playing tricks with us! donno y, just after we sighed, she walked back, and lookin into our classrm. Mr Faizid then walked out and i guess, asked her if she was in 10s6. HA! she gave a light nod, and went into the classrm. SJ and me was laughing lik hell hahas. He then sacastically answered, "hey seem that we dont hav to change class anymore rite? she can be our xiào hua le." I defended myself by saying, "hey, dont judge the book by it's cover." In the end, after knowing her alittle, she seems to be quite a good person hahas.

After skool, she [dont wanna disclose her name caz ned ask permission HA!] went outside of the classrm to wait for her fren which is in another class beside ours. I said to SJ, hey our classmate :D Guess WAD HE REPLIED*%^&? He shouted beside her, "hey Cw, U say she chio rite, wan her phone no. just say lah!" She turned around and looked at me, i glance at her blankly, surprised by my frens 'sec skool culture of jokin.' she turned away and i saw her face blush... man, i was lik face red too donno wad to do -.- Luckily a light bulb popped out within miliseconds, i replied, "Har? U talking to me ar?" then i walked to the nearest toilet to take cover. I guess smthing will happen tmr ha :X Anw, i promised and swore to God that, I'll LEArn To Get Use TO ur CULture!!! I swear to SJ.

Ok, lets keep it short, seems lik i'm writing too much today. After Bball training, as usual, took 174 bus home. On the way back, 3 Rv girls board the bus at their skool's bus-stop. They walk passed me and then, after awhile, walked back and stand in front of my seat. Cant really explain how it really looks lik, but just bare with me :D They started chatting in front of me, speakin quite loudly, thinkin that i deaf or wadever -.- they talked abt the air-con of the bus is quite smelly, and at first i thought i'am the one who they're sayin is smelly. But then i did bathed in skool and changed back to my skool uniform. Then one of the girl took her Hp and took and pic of me (I swear she took me even though she tried to use her textb to cover her Hp slightly, as i hear the 'Chickki') then they open their tb and cover their nose, and talk abt smthing lik "hey my book seems to smell nicer." after awhile, one of them asked me, "erm do u find the bus smelly?" i then replied a "har"? then the other 2 came in and start a conversation blabla. Suddenly they asked if i gotta fb account and if they can add me... i was lik har again, but gave them in the end as they seems fine and quite gd lookin :S they then continue ask things lik hey, wad skool are u from, see i told u he from mi - another replied and so on. Luckily bus reached Jp and i Ziao, if nt donno how reply their weird Qn. they waved a bye and i wave back but nv replied the bye Ha!

I guess my life is really gonna change into a much more interesting 1 hahas, nt gonna stay stadnent forever :D always thought that i always nv fail to giv ppl a bad impression of me, a person who is nt very gd to socialise with due to my stern look ;( but now, i've gt a new mind set of myself now. Hey, Nt Praising myself Ok! hahas ^^

self confidence levelled up~

2010-02-14T10:15:00.000-08:00

Today's really fun man! hahas ;D but i'm really dead beaten so... i'll keep things shorter and more general. From now, I would lik to keep some info low profile as it's some kinda of my privacy and i really kind of find it weird when frens ask abt wad i blogged be4... u know, everything u did ytd is being prompt by ur frens the next day -.- I mean, it's nthin special for me to brag abt thus i try to keep it short and simple from now on, unless it's smthing real real stupid and lame like PraWNthing [that even i, laughed after pondering back] or some really Too wonderful to be true event, i'll be sure to share my joy u all readers hahas :D
To - anon, erm sry to put u into my blog, but as the taq box's capacity is too duh small, i would lik to complete wad i urge to clarify. Erm... cont from taq - even if u're nt some1 i know, that u just pass by and read my blog, still, i wont mind sharing the whole thing with u as sometime, i do find it hard to keep things all to myself... So i hope at least u might leave me something lik ur msn username if possible, for me to share the situation with - someone who is really interested abt me and the person i love. thx again.
Lastly, i'll lik to end it with a quote from Me HAha lols... too dead tired to continue bloggin le -.-
Wadever u do, when it comes to love, Nv Ever Tell the person abt how u feel for her before knowing each other quite well, Or worst, telling her abt loving at first sight! Trust me, as it'll caz awkwardness and u're bond to fail 90% of the time [dare nt say 100% caz ever i, do believe in loving at first sight... just that i dont succeed]. Learn to control ur feeling and keep it low. Till u get to know her well - familier and able to speak with the person everynow and then, thats when u ought to then explode ur feelings to her, to melt her heart.
True life experience~

2010-02-10T06:27:00.000-08:00

Move on. Getting the hang of my Skool life now hahas. :D Life is so damn great now, hell yea :D
But then, stress has yet to start -.-

2010-02-06T05:01:00.000-08:00

Was supposed to post on ytd but fell asleep be4 posting =.=
hmm, Mi orientation last day was alot better then the first few days. Lols, finally god let me dance with a person that i would call a girl. Previous dance was like wtf... with girls that is...
=.= hahas. Anw, after the dance, i was astonished by the girl whom i danced with. she asked if i am attached. (hmm, i guess i aint that bad looking as how i use to thought to be) hahas.
Ok, lets skip how the day goes by as i dont think there's any special thing to mention. Umm, during the finale of the orientation which is the last part of event of the day, they mention to us that we can find any person u would like to dance with. Then, i had someone in my mind that i would like to ask for a dance. She was a gd fren i just made. hahas. hmm, i felt that she was quite unique, and good looking yea. But after much thought, i think it might nt be a gd thing - to ask her for a dance as i know that she aready have a boyfren and it might be alittle awkward. hahas... so in the end, i dance with my fren- a guy, and many girls around was lik laughin at us, saying that we're funny Lols -.-
Ok, gtg to get some admin stuff done, for the march basketball overseas trip camp... Hais... so tiring these days.

2010-02-03T04:35:00.000-08:00

Hi hi, today was great. Hahas, i'm so so happy today, as i felt that there isn't any boundary or limit for me. My new Coach said that he will stretch me. hehe hahas. Hmm, yea, perviously i thought my standard in basketball was at limit... but now, it seems that i could be hell lot better. Hmm, just shock how high i could jump and hang in the air to shoot the ball in. Hahas, i'm sure i'll be a brand new person after some time. I promise i'll be back to my secondary skool to defeat mack, Soon hahas. Playing Kobe style, speed and jump - my style. Be the ace...

2010-02-02T03:38:00.000-08:00

Hmm, i guess today was quite an surprising day. It has been long since i blushed. Lols =.= It was during break today, u know, as usual, went to the canteen and get some food. Since i'm still quite green in this skool, i hadn't try most of the food in the canteen. So i decided to buy their dry noodle meepok today. When i went back to my table with the food, i gt a glance of a pre-u1 girl. She was sitting on the same bench just beside me with her frens. I sat down, and out of the blue, she started the conversation. Ermm, how much is ur prawn noodle? I turn and look at her eye... blush :Xxxx
I stuttered my words but am glad to produce a reply. Err, it's 2.20. I decided to hide my expression quickly by taking a sudden bite of the noodle. She then asked, err, isit alright if i can take one of those prawns? Once again, i was like... !!! like choked by the air =.= i was like stopping for 3 seconds looking at her. Luckily, a word just came out from my mouth that i wasn't even thinking abt using that word to reply. luckily man, it is a word that fits her question. "Sure." after saying that, she pushes her bowl nearer to my bowl. then i took a prawn and gave her. JUST a Prawn... and i was like donno wad am i doing. When she took her bowl away, my sense came back. Lols am i stupid, y only giv her 1 prawn??? Mind blank maybe. I took the initative and asked. Ermm, do u wan more? I can giv u more since i dont eat much prawns. "hahas, it's ok. Thx hahas," she smiled. Smiled back.
After finishing our food, i went to get a drink... then i think back, Lols Prawn noodle and dont eat much prawn? Hahas...
Anyway, it's gd to make new frens, but i'll nv forgt my old frens, espically those special ones and the one and only, that i love. Move On.

2010-01-28T06:17:00.000-08:00

Of all people that i've seen, i only see u. Of all people i hear, i only think abt u. Of all previous events and happy times, i only remember u. Of all people that care for me, i only love u. I donno how can i sustain these words but i really miss u. Awaiting for ur reply... the girl i'm obsessed of.
miss u .

2010-01-22T09:22:00.000-08:00

Sometimes, i wonder if i'm thinking too much/ too into love, that i could giv up my time just to see someone even just from afar. Maybe i'm really just doing things on my own accord. I know i'm really into it, the feeling is gushing out fast, but is that person feeling the same to me as wad i'm feeling to her? I'm suffocating and donno if i should be happy or sad. Sometimes i really wonder, if i'm gd? I fear that i'm nt gd enough, i fear that u already had someone in ur mind, i fear this, i fear that. Questions popping all around in my mind. Hais. Skool might be starting soon for me and i'm really really gonna miss u. The biggest fear is that i would forget abt u... T.T Time is getting tighter and tighter for me. How i wish if the world is a fairytale, where the frog could be together with the princess, the one and only princess that no any others could compare her beauty with [which is her] . If only she accepts me, the frog, i'm fine to be her prince, even if it's once a frog.
I Love u, seriously. I just cant say it, as i just felt that it's really impossible for me to get such a wonderful girl. I can only wait... till one day, that u do feel for me too.
Love u~

2010-01-20T10:09:00.000-08:00

In this world, million faces that i have seen, but the only one who caught me - my attention, that was u. The one and only~
really seriously really seriously really seriously really seriously fond in u... miss u lots too.

2010-01-18T05:54:00.000-08:00

Back from crematorium. Aunt passed away just too sudden, it was 3 days ago that the news reached us. She was my aunt- father side. GuGu was wat i use to call her. hahas, still remembered once i called her gugu bird when i was kindergarden :x And yea, she is a kind and funny person hahas. She always talk to me during any relative gatherings, lik maybe ask me if i wan anything to eat or nedta buy anything new... as i was quite shyish and seldom talk alot that time when i was younger. Hais... saw my dad cry for the first millennian time. I cant say that i understand his feeling but i guess... it would be the same for me, if my elder sis pass away...
Anw, life stills goes on. My aunt went to a place, a place that some days, everyone of us, our family and relative will finally meet tgt. So for now, i'll stay strong and onwards. u too dad , with love care and respect...
i'm missing u... so much.

2010-01-17T11:21:00.000-08:00

My life is gonna be tough, but i will accept it unconditionally. Hope my last week's break is a fulfilling one. Aim hard, towards my goals.
Let dreams be the substances of my life. Onwards!
i'm always... thinkin abt u.

2010-01-08T11:53:00.000-08:00

New Year resolutions!
-O lvl's .gd grades, sufficient to the course i wanted
-schooling 2/3 yrs poly/jc

Get into a course or school i wan
Study hard, and get into University in 4/5 yrs time
Finish all homework be4 doing my own stuff
Read more books and make readin newspapers a must
Main focus shift to studies and good grades than to gamings and leisure stuff.make new frens and be expose to different races/ religion of frens
never forget my true frens i've made till now [as they were the real important ones tat i can trust and believe with]
learn not to be sacastic to people i had bad impression on [as they might not be as bad as i think of]
never ever return to my bad old self of using brute, but the new me of using brain to settle things
Respect others so as they respect u in return

-Love [ I'm serious abt it. when i said the magical words, it means that i've really chosen u and no one else ever. thought and ponder long enough... abt u ]
Learn to love and accept myself :D
Finally, is, love the person i truly love, forever, till one day that i hav no choice but to let go
hope i could get her, a girlfren, a person i can shower my feelings, love, gratitude, happiness and joy with
If she had someone in her mind strongly, let go of her
after that, recover and heal - the pain, then get in a new love again, if possible...

o kays, thats all for my resolution [for now :P] (well, it's never too late to learn abt something new and then add in into the resolution list rite? to me, dreams or the small part of dreams- resolutions, are nv ending.) So, when something struck my mind, i'll be sure to add it in my resolution list :D

Thinking back... i was a very naughty boy when i was small. But i was touched by my dad's words - he said it when i was P2?, and of course, i still remembers it. "It's ok if u dont do well in studies, but u hav to do well in ur character. That's something more important than studies." Ok, i admit that i blame him for causing me not to try my really best in studies becaz of those words, but i'm really glad to hav such a father like him, who teaches me to put character more valued than studies, that makes me a better person. This is why i've changed ever since the words, and i'll always love my parents [though i nv tell them la of course =.= mushy...] they are really the ones that makes me a person i'm truly proud of, myself... erhem, nt sayin myself that I hav great character lah, i'm nt thick skined u know? =.= but a person with character, passable and acceptable by others.

quality is more important than quantity [ in most cases], so as a person character to smartness.
both aspect are equally important, but i know myself, which is more important, even by a slightest margine.

I Love u, and i really do. Awaiting secretly... just willing to wait for the only you, the day where miracles happen - that is, the day of acception my token of love~

2010-01-02T08:01:00.000-08:00

I'll folo my heart.
colours/ no./flower - has it's meaning.

2009-12-27T12:45:00.000-08:00

3 fun days... I hope the fun could hide my emo. I hope that i could forget all my troubles and start anew. Wish the 3 days could heal the pain of my heart. Diverting my attention more on others, so that i wont release any negative bluffs of mine. I must force myself to do it. I can do IT! Overcome the greatest challange in my life. undenyable thoughts of u~ On the journey to learn to love myself be4 loving the others.
I know 3 days is gonna be too little for me to get over u - impossible, but at least the urge. maybe by then, i would'nt be so obsessed by u. haish, the shot is deep, way too deep that i cant escape the crutch of it~ never had i been so damn serious abt it. Noone understands.

2009-12-26T05:52:00.000-08:00

Yeah... today was great. Ok! first, wake up late, thus unable to go shopping with frens... Anyway, went Jp to get a box and a card to wrap smthing up. And yea, suddenly thought abt ytd steamboat, like forgot to eat smthing. O YES! ClamS and shells... T.T really forgt abt those hahas. Anyway, just now just went to Popular to get a book called "how to get what you want" 'And Want What You Have'. Hahas, quite an ex book, but it teaches how to be confident and stuffs? hahas, shalln't elaborate it =x Ok! withdraw 600 and giv it to my parents and sibling. They kept rejecting it but i insisted and in addition to my lame excuse that "it's my first job so i'm gonna giv u $ next time, wait long long :D" hahas and so on, they hav no choice but to accept it - due to my persistance and stubborness. [ and of course, that excuse is fake, if u all havnt get the meanin of it :P as i had long vow that any $ i earn, i will part some to my family. ] And yea, lastly, pass the thing i made. I have no more regretz now. I will start reading my book now and i'm sure i will be successful the next time. Live on...
Yea, the pain - straight through my heart... the moment u took that, i knew its over. I am very sad... yes, i really am. But wad to do? Although i learnt from pass that love can be nurtured, but i just dont like to force my way into love. I feel that, if someone doesn't love u as how u love that person, it's pointless to force the relation. Yeah, i know that this time, i really did my best... but there's always room for improvement. So... i'll live on, and challenge the world. Everlasting frens~ Everlasting Love~ I will do my best and try to forget u... for the best of all.
p.s. hope u like that handmade thingy.

2009-12-25T09:51:00.000-08:00

Christmas was really fun. In addition of today's steamboat... Sryz that i was late guys :P hehe. Ok, lets prepare for the upcomin chalet in a day time.
Hahas, so stupid that i am, to walk pass her shop almost once everyday... Just found out that there's more than 1 of it... in other malls =.-''' Ok... anyway, i vow to stop doing stupid stuffs that i ought not to be doin. And i vow that, when i'm richer and older, then i would think abt love. I hope by then, i will succeed, unlike all previous conclusion. Ok, must really force myself not to think abt u so much from now on... though will be still dreamin of u of course, as u know, it's free for all to dream xP. But for now that i hav learnt to face the reality, i hav to succeed in learnin to giv up. Painful decision, but for the best of all. Lastly, today's gonna be a good good day.
Will always... secretly [12][15][22][5] u ~

2009-12-23T12:22:00.000-08:00

O yes arh! finally, hard work has paid off. Today marks the end of my first job- marche. Hahas, i'm feeling quite satisfying caz just jumped over a stepping stone in my life. Well, shall not be sad and elaborate the grandma story abt the leaving, more would come in the future. Hahas, gratz myself being so SO so successful in my first ever job. Confident and moral up ;D Ok! Should really spend some time to relax and slack And more Excercise too. Keep fit and Healthy Always :D
hmm... done my little handcraft, though much credits nt from me, but still...aiyo, hais... no point talkin abt it, no chance givin it away anyw.
Seems to be avoiding me, yeah, i can feel it. if my presence would make u rather awkward, i rather nt exist in ur life... i hate myself givin u things that makes u guilty, i hate myself for being so straightforward, i hate myself for nt knowing u earlier, i hate myself for being such a mute. Regreted it, if it's really impossible, i really still wans to talk to u and be frens with u. It do seems hard now... Learnt my lesson, nv will i repeat this mistake again in my life~
Really really wanna talk to u... much. In melancholy emotion T.T

2009-12-18T09:13:00.000-08:00

Sky's darken as days goes by... Smiles of the sun seems voided by the dark clouds.
Hi guys, i'm here to blog again, as be4. Erm, gonna quit marche soon :P 24th hahas. I hope i wont miss the staffs there, caz they're really gd to me & my frens. Everyday seems so smooth sailing at there. Hahas, time sure flies fast. 1 month of work finally is comin to an end. Ok, i've decided to go chalet ba, i dont wanna regret missing my classmates after we seperate and continue each's own path. Hahas...
the 1 i truly miss, is u... Do u know how much I love u? nvm, caz u'll nv know it. hahas... But, i'm still gonna try, just try, to make smthing for u for cristmas. Hand-make it, though havnt started it yet... i'm sure it will take up some of my time... but for u, a thousand times over. Sian... uncertain if u will have time to accept my gift...
So damn obsessed- Love~~

2009-12-15T13:13:00.000-08:00

Today, almost late for my work... luckily i caught the train in time and reach my workin place 5mins late... Wosh =.= hahas nv get any scold caz i apoligized be4 they could even say anything :D Work today for me was quite special today, caz for dessert/pizza bakery counter, they lack 1 person for closing. So in the end, they arranged me to go help out the counter. T.T scarld two of my fingers, caz first time learning to use those machines to bake pizza and bread. But it was easy though, caz the heatin is done by the machines and since i am still nt qualified to make the pizza and stuff, so the mentor or the person in charge of the counter did most of the stuffs. He was kind anyway xD. O yes... i dont feel lik havin the mood to do anything, even work. It's only 1 day has past and i am feeling so zzz [missin on smthing]. But then, wad pushes me over my limit to continue focusing on work till the end was, the task that i hav taken, which is that, i promise to giv my best in my job, though it's short term. Yea, it's somekinda responsibility rite? When i took up the task, i must finish it well no matter how hard it goes... Ok, tmr is off day for me, i better take a good rest and hope i will feel much better... Bye~
Thx for the memory u gave me... but in my heart, i know best myself that, the memory weren't enough. Ppl can say that i am greedy or wadever, but... wad i really trully wan - is the real u. Yea... i'm obsessed wif u, that i agree.

2009-12-14T08:34:00.000-08:00

Prom can only be described in 1 word~ too good to be true. Hahas, i cheated :P [no. of words] Yea, the feeling there was so good, and all were havin phototakin and stuffs. Hahas, time sure flys fast... the party ended in an blinkin of an eye... the party was at the climax, but i'm nt as elated? Hais... i seem to be losing something... a thing that could make me real, fully happy. Yea... just 4 letters, but withhold deep meanings. Thats wad i hav nv gotten, thus, i am nv happy to my fullest. Hahas. Ok better stop daydreaming abt those impossible and look forward to life. Maybe sometime good might folo up into my life.
Ok! today, i would lik to share with u guys, one of my long term goals. HAHas, it's to be a commando :P lols, seems hard rite? Yeah, thats y i mus really master my breast stroke... i cant finish my 8 lap with freestyle to get my swimming awards. But first, i must hav a gd and strong body, so, i'm gonna x2 my daily training of situps and push up. Hope goals could be reached :D Byes~
many goals- that i hav, just that one special one was euu~

2009-12-13T09:58:00.000-08:00

Yea... today gona be a day, a big day, of fun and excitment. 500+ gone for this... hahas, but i promise that, i wont spend anymore this yr. Must save $. Hope every1 will hab fun today. Lets... Party :D haahas.
Hais... everyday of my workin days were great, seriously. My first job in my life and was so successful. No troubles no harsh scoldin, no quarrals no nothing. Everyone there are so gd, made tons of frens there. Hahas, maybe i really do hab quite a gd personality eh? [self praising LoLs] hahas... yea, i always believe that if u respect others, this will gain urself respect frm others. And, when workin, regardless of wad situation, always giv ur best, so that best will be returned back to u in some ways or other. HA! work is real easy and smooth sailing. Yes, any work is tough and never easily but it's just tat it's easier than i expected. Now abit lik sadded caz gona quit soon... hahas, enjoy life euu know?
Anyway, lets alll really really enjoy prom tmr. ;D IF possible, must take pic with everyone- memorial purpose. So Long and lets reLAX~~

2009-12-11T13:11:00.000-08:00

Hais... thinkin back demoralised me alot. Maybe i had watched too much of those touchin movies when i was young, that made me thought of a stupid dream at that time. Stupidly that i was always hopping for my turn to come. Erm... sort of lik givin a girl that i love- a necklace, helping her put on tat necklace too. Aiyo... must hav been influenced by those ~~ shows hahas. But maybe this is why as an advantage that, it teaches me to love, and really thought hard abt wad's the most important thing i wan in the world. Hahas... but then, cons is that... it makes me eyein for "special" and "impossible to get girls"? Maybe the real bad things is that it makes me to set my goals too high? So??? Should i lower my standard? Hais... yea i should... i ain't that great either. Bye Bye to my stupid dreams and hope... and face the reality bah.
Sohais...
so long~~

2009-12-10T08:53:00.000-08:00

Find that guy that will pick up every piece of your shattered heart & put it back together; Replacing it with a piece of his. ~ my love quote from facebk... find it quite meaningful, but... seems that it wont be used soon and for now...
Hahas... today should be my off day, but it seems that the restrauant neds manpower, thus i agreed to go back and work... u knw, extra $ and since there's nthing to do at home anyw...
Errr, actually like like the place and environment already, but erm... i hate serving ppl :P hence will be quitin sooner than expected ;D hahas... i'm best at giving excuses as all know... But its all white lies xD.
Ok... must get rdy for prom night gear, since its cfm. Hahas... must wear smthing nice for sure... a gear in orchard ion POA shop caught my mind... but its lik 300? ... ... havnt get pay spent so much? somemore a addidas basketball shoe caught my mind too... high cut of abt 160? wow... if i really buy both, half my pay is gone =.- so... gonna decide it when i go there again on fri - sun. Hais... work is sure tiring... Buaills and so long...

2009-12-04T14:20:00.001-08:00

Gonna ask u somedays -soon. Now focus on my own life.
Bulking Up confidence... stay cool. Be myself~~

2009-12-03T13:35:00.000-08:00

Hehe... Fun is comin soon. But be4 that, on 8th dec, there will be a preopening at somerset marche. Gt invited to go there and eat for free. Hahas... its a high class swiss restaurant with low pay--- hahas jkjk/ if jenson [boss / lao da] read this, i'm dead meat ^^ ;D Anw, i still hab 1 free slot to invite some1 to go there eat for free too. Hais... there's no1 special to invite now... maybe will just ask around my frens if any is free. Somemore my given time slot is from 12 to 3pm on 8th. Hahas... After eating, still nedta rush back to vivo and work night shift. Kinda rush and tight man... Ok, shalln't worry that much for it. I'm gonna get rdy to buy my prom night wear and be ready for fun soon- prom/ chalet. Must enjoy as much as possible now... be4 'dooms' day comes next yr.
Sooo long... and be happy always.

2009-12-02T10:30:00.000-08:00

Hey guys... sry :D It has been awhile since i post. Erm... gd news! Will only be posting when free or something funny/emotional/fun/etc... strike my mind.
Today... hahas, thought abt my job, no high pay... However, i found the reason to continue the job... shallnt giv any thought from my frens - to change job. Well, it's caz, tat, i am working in an environment with kind and more experience ppl. Best of all, i learnt alot in my workin place. Working there really giv me plenty time to reflect on myself. It help me to find myself back... My true self - the nv giv up and die attitude and to aim for almost perfect. Most importantly, gaining back my desire to be the best. Yea... u knw? Its fine to heed other's advice... it's fine to accept help from others. Do u knw, that accepting ppl's help is an act of a person who is willing to learn more? Do u knw tat, falling and accepting the failure, is an attribute of the strong? The weak will nv stay weak... while the strong, might nt advance as much as the weak. Sounds hard eh? Well... the simplfied meaning is that only the independent are really the weak ones. When fail, they will most proberly take the longest to recover. As in... for instance... when i was young, i dont believe in any1. I do things myself... And i always thought that things would be best if i was the one doing it. I'll nv wan or ask for help from any1... I'll try to do all things by myself... Be independent. Yesh, neither it's wrong or wad to be independent... nor to accept failure. Yes, it would be best to get everything done perfectly... But the world doesnt go this way. Sometimes, when being independent, we will find ourselves trapped in stress... keeping all things and problems to ourselves... And becaz of couldnt accept failure, if we were to fail once... we will drop real deep into the pithole. Things would be better if we aim slightly lesser than perfect. Same goes for failling... Nv be afraid to fail, to do things wrong. As long as we knw that we tried our best, if we fail, take it as a learning point. And of course, learn from mistake and improve. Thus, i tell myself that... i'll nv stay weak as a weakling. Of course... if i could get the best out of somethings, i will do it... just like a race, dont think of it's a must to get first. But think it in another way, i will do my very best to win others, let others be proud of u. This way, there will be less pressure on ourself. Also, if we weren't individualist, when we failed something, we could share the pain tgt... of course, if we were success, we hav ppl to share the joy with ;D hahas... Yeah, even ppl that likes independence [like me sometimes maybe?] they still needs a fren/ partner/soulmate, thats wad i believe.
All and all, yes... i gt defeated once again... as always. But this time, i learn to be confident, to endure the pain and channal the pain to the strength of making myself a stronger person, so that i can stand up again faster... I believe... that i will be successful and stronger after many failures. I trust myself... I'm nt born to fail... but to... born and fail uncountable times And be successful in the end.
Thx for reading my 'compo'... Sooo long guys... byes~

2009-11-30T09:40:00.000-08:00

Does prom nedta partner? If yes... should i ask u to be my partner? You seem to be quite stressful now hahas... I hope it would be a successful one, so that u would be happy ;D Yea, its hard to plan/ organize things. There are bound to be obstacles. But remember... Nv a thing is easy... just lik chasing u lols ;D But... trust me, when that occasion is over successfully, u will feel the most proud and happiness in urself. So... persevere and all the best for ur thingy. Gd luk too... wish to see u there soon ;D

I knw it seems impossible... but i'll try... caz 나는 u를 사랑한다

2009-11-29T11:52:00.001-08:00

Hais... i think lik i gt it... Lets be frens.

2009-11-24T01:52:00.000-08:00

harlos, just went to cut hair, caz job starts tmr... must look neat first, caz its the first appearance given to ppl outside. hahas. In addition, done my injection today, typhoid jab was it? Ok Job tmr, so... lets rock and hav fun today while it last... :D

Die le, it seems that u really hav someone in ur mind... Am i a step slower as always? Hais... heartaching now, i must be unsuccessful. Felt lik crying out my mind... Hais... let me try and divert my focus to exercising now... better dont think too much now and feel saddened.
Will stay strong...

2009-11-23T12:51:00.000-08:00

Its really too rush i guess... Yeah, time is nt riped. I just can't push myself to say it to u face to face. I fear lots, hell lots that i might fail again. Although i've gone through failure for so long, the fear is still there, not overcomed. Yea, [ kai bu liao kou rang ta zhi diao ], this song really explain everything. I hav nothing i can do... just hope for the best.
But one thing for sure... i am truly in love with u... I really wanna tell u straight - face to face. Hais, but then... T.T I keep having this a kind of a feeling, a gone case situation... as if that i stand no chance... I really blame myself hard on... where are my confidence??? ^#$#&%*^#@#!!! Tsk Tsk... saddened. As days goes, the feeling of distancing u is growing, i feel more lik a loser... somemore if job starts, tireness may cause us to distance... WAaaaaaaa i better stop thinking too much... abt the urge to get u. I mustn't be rush... must take it step by step at a time... Aiyo... i better go slp le, maybe can dream of u? lols :P my sense of humour... mus be lame =.=
Better nt think so much, step by step a time... Love u much, deep down in my heart~~
I believe time will also giv me the strength, to be ready and, the confidence to confess u to - straight on face to face... for real.

2009-11-23T02:04:00.000-08:00

Woots... first step to success in my life. Gt hired. Tmr mus go buy a black pants and take some kind of injection. Job will be starting on Wed anw. Hahas, so happy... (: Finally, i will be starting my adult life... The end of my boring holidays and the Start of hardworking days. Job, here i come xD
Wad i've done have done. Hahas, hope u lik the present i gav. Trust me, i really hav no intention of getting u or something. Caz, after much failure experience, i've learnt that - nv set my hopes high, if nt, when i drop, its gonna be very hurtful. However, that present i bought is rather quite unique, that i agree. I've nv bought such weird stuff be4... It mus be awkward to accept it. Hahas, but i really feel that it will suit u perfectly, so... hope u lik it ba. Wish u smile and be happy - always.

Aiyo... i knw its too early to think too much, as in... u knw, bgr. Yea, we barely knw each other, less than 2 month i reckon? Yes, we ain't so close too yet, as in we dont knw each other very well. Somemore, u told me be4 that u might aready hav somebody in ur mind ): So... i think its better for me nt to rush things too much, maybe we will still be friends for another 6 months? I think this would be fair to u and me. By then, if there is a change in ur mind of forgeting some1 u love, and we understand each other more, i believe i would still stand a small chance :D I really love u, so i will wait, perservere, to show u how much i do care abt u. This will then be by action, and nt just plain words. U knw, as the saying goes : action speaks louder than words. Yes, my hope ain't high, nevertheless, i will do my best - to get u :P
Will be waiting, i promise. The Love for one and only.

2009-11-21T09:34:00.001-08:00

Woah, time sure flies fast, even fast then light. Ok, tmr will be monday, my job interview. I hope i would be success, caz then i can work tgt with my classmates - griffin. However, if i am unsuccessful, then maybe i will consider to work at my uncle's office. The down point of this is that i would be working with people of older age group/ unfamiler. Hais... Sure have to find a job to spend my time anyway... Gd Luk to me tmr... hope the interview would be a successful one [for both griffin and me].

Planning to get u something weird... donno if u would accept it. Wait u for oppotunity, Love u for eternity.
Lightning Wei

2009-11-20T08:58:00.000-08:00

Happy birthday day :D hahas, happy for u that u're finally 16. May u continue to look fascinating and keep up the goddess character of urs. :P my words seems funny eh? lols, but thats from my heart, hahas. Hope u will enjoy ur precious day today. Smile always... :D
Hais, i hab a weird wish, to celebrate birthday with someone i love. This wish was made when i was pri 6? yea, should be somewhre there bah. But, this dream has nv happen. T.T saddened... Hahas... u must be enjoying ur birthday with ur family or ur best frens rite? Abit sad that i am, since we were'nt that close to spend time tgt... Yea, i've nv been successful in relations be4... i should nt set my hopes too high, fear that i might nt be able to stand up after a great fall. I feel that its really hard for me to get u, but i will try- my best. However, i must start to set my thinking rite, that if it's really impossible [ once again ], i should take 1 step back then... But!!! still being a great fren of urs. Having such a beatifully and kind fren is an advantage or something to be proud of rite? Hehe lols, i think of u till siao tiao le :P ... okkk enough of mushy words =.= my hair follicles are standing... say this kind of thing, i think like quite weirdy too T.T
Enjoy ur Bd! Lightning Wei
p.s. Still no ideas of wad to get for u... sian, maybe may hav to giv u a belated 1... somemore hard to see u too :X

2009-11-18T08:41:00.000-08:00

Hais... No progress. Am i fated to be like this? Anyway, glad that u're back (:
Today went to find job... Never done a job be4, so coming out to face the new challange in the world. Am taking this as an oppotunity to Burn some time / maybe gain some experience too hahas. Found some, but rejected them due to unfavourable conditions. Am I being picky? Nah, it's just that i only wanted to work for a month and with maybe sat and sun free, it would be best... Furthermore, it isn't my long term goal [ as in work as those job that i could find now ], i wanna work in bank, office or computer companies.... when i grow up. U know, like those with high salaries - that could support my future family as well as my parents. T.T hard goal to aim for eh? Nothing is ever easy, so, i will study hard/ nt giving up and aim for my ambition. Well, seems that i am talking big now lols, but i will do it, i promise. Maybe after i hab a stable income, my love luck will shine too =.= hahas. Yeah, pondering hard these few days, piority reason for kids like us to study in skool is none other than getting a fine job in the future rite?
Though now it's holiday - a long and draggy one, i felt that it isn't the holiday i wanted. During latest the sentosa trip with my mates, i felt emo [maybe?], nt that happy as be4. I vividly recalled the time our class spent, lets say the sentosa trip in june after Chinese O's paper. It's full of joy and laughter. But now, during that sentosa trip few weeks ago, i felt empty. I seriously felt that i am lacking of something... something or someone, that i could really share my greatest joy with... Yea, lack of a partner, i reckon? (Maybe at june, i was still thinking about playing with frens thats all.) Seeing those couples at the beach really makes me saddened. Hahas, regreted nt knowing u early... Sooo suay. Sohai. If time could really turn back, i wish that i had befriend with u nt after O's, but much earlier... Wooolala, time nv wait, thats for sure. Lets all move on and see how it goes. i'll try my best - hardest of best. [get u]
Additionally, Good luk to you, me- of finding a situable job and, good luk for all frens working.
Deeply in love thoughts, Lightning Wei

2009-11-13T04:18:00.000-08:00

Aiyo... Suay la.

2009-11-12T09:16:00.000-08:00

Lols, i know i should be studying now but, i suddenly have the urge to blog Time Check--> 2.15am... Hais, i am so disappointed in myself... why did i nt have enough confident to ask u to be my friend earlier? If i had bulk my confidence up sooner, i would have know u much more... then we might be together now... Why am i such a stupid person? Why do i have such a stupid freaking ******* weakness - of when seeing girls of my choice, i cant even speak properly... Am i such a loser in my previous life that make me born with this confident in relations -weakness? Tsk Tsk... Anger boiling... hahas. Now my biggest problem is that i could not find any ways to be tgt and to know each other better... T.T You're really a lovely and good person, but u r always in full schedule. Hahas, i cant blame u as it's my fault for not confessing to u earlier... now that i could not "book" u to go out tgt, it's my biggest mistake too. Sadded that i am. But nevertheless, I thought hard- deeply, and i am really sure that i love u. It's nt like/crush/mind joke///, but it's love- eternity. I dont know how to tell u, but the real reason of why i never had stead be4, is that i always believe that BGR is a serious thing that could lead to forever life long partner. It could be a damaging weapon of hurting someone if we misuses Love or the phrase "I love u" To me, "I love u is a very strong and ought to be a touching phrase that i will use, only when i am 100% sure i love a person. T.T many ppl may say that i am thinking too much... Hais, it's real hard to explain now but i will tell it to u how i feel, in black and white, soon [proberly the period of ur birthday, written to u in 'letters' lols traditional love methods?]. Now i only wanted, is to ask u when are u free in the full scheduled holiday, maybe half of a day or wad ever so, to go out tgt. Hahas, i must be dreaming or thinking too much... It will never happen unless i bulk up my confidence now and ask u soon. [ Promised myself not to regret again, so i will make sure i will phrase the Qn rite to ask u out/provided u r free and accept it of course =.= ] Hahas, really wished that u could tell me when u r free/ to go out tgt and know more abt each other... Sian... really hoped time would roll back or not we are still studying in a same skool now... But in reality, time will nv rollback as, time and tide waits for no man... My only wish now, is that we could have some time to be tgt... after that then we could thing abt having BGR and then Forever Eternal partners. <100% sure that i love u, nt a joke pretty girl>

May wish come true and soon~~ Dream girl - perfect girl with underfined level in terms of character.
p.s. nothing scare to hide, if u [person i love] were to read my post, it would be best -hahas (:
but if u r nt 100% sure u r that person i love, plz keep this to urself and nt spreading to others. As only that girl knew that i love her [of course, since i only confess to her after her O's. and no1 knew abt it except her]
I do not ned any external help, i wanna be true to her, myself, showing my weakness or strength to her
myself. Thx... with utmost regards, Lightning Wei.

2009-11-12T06:09:00.001-08:00

Nv knew such a divine girl exists, she is so kind, so beaut, gd personality, and ... many more. I seriously wonder why she isn't as popular as she should be... - classmates or ppl in our skool must be badly blinded... hahas :P Anyway, now i am facing a real big time problem... how to get close to her and spend time with her??? Die >.<''' [love u]
Happy birthday to shermaine... from 4e2. Todays bowling was fun, though now hand cramp...

2009-11-11T03:53:00.000-08:00

I have decided... I will get her. Nt for fun, but for ever.
confessed.

2009-11-10T23:31:00.000-08:00

New life, new heart, new ideas, new thoughts... hahas
i seems lighter now... Glad i did my best for O's - ending soon.
Wad awaits is to confess and to hab fun.

2009-11-03T11:59:00.000-08:00

life seems harder...

2009-10-19T09:44:00.000-07:00

Sohai... donno how to put pics on my blog... As in... nvm,donno how explain. Gtg bye. Ps: any difference in 2 yrs?

sec4 sec4

sec 2

2009-09-27T01:43:00.000-07:00

I think i am nt myself lately... after pondering much, i feel that i should learn to forget and revert back to my true self... And now, i should really be studying and nt abt others. I Swear, really swear, that today will be my last day for gaming and all other stupid stuff. i trust that i am a person full of determine... so, i will focus hard on studies. Its nv too late nor its too early. Be my own true self.

Anyway, i wish that every1 i know will do their best on their Exam. Gd Luk guys, and all the best. x)

2009-09-25T07:13:00.000-07:00

sadded. nothing more to say. gg. Gd luk to my exam now.

2009-09-12T02:19:00.000-07:00

Life is full of Hw... Die... Hw doesn't seem to end no matter how much i do. Hahas... But i will persevere de. Lets all sprint though the finish line... O level. Gd Luk to All. ;D

loving u, loving u... time is still nt rite. Study first ;D

2009-09-04T08:31:00.000-07:00

O yes, prelim is over... stress and workload slacken, but still, i shalln't stop. Taking a little break is a must, but i must spent my time well, espically on subject that i am weak at. Anyway, today we went to safra for some fun there x). After that, we went to griffin house play. It was very fun to spend time tgt like these... hahas. Ok gtg le... Lets persevere for another 1 and a half month. Gd luk to all frens and strive hard too xD

an ans...

2009-08-22T07:05:00.000-07:00

Will wait. Maybe that straight ans will come after O's.
Studies, Here I come x)

2009-08-16T04:13:00.000-07:00

sometimes i wonder, that maybe i am thinking too much (maybe i still gt %?). Do i hab the chances, or actually its really over? Actually, i hav been thinking of these every nite... i really dont know. Day by day, the urge to be with u is slowly disappearing. Told myself to try harder, but confidence is losing it. many thought came into my mind, do u luv me? well it seemed like nt. i've sacrifice much for u, rejected many for u, hoping if i will hav a chance from u. The time might nt be rite, but wad i really wished for is an ans, a word or a hint or even a straight ans that could giv me a boost to court u. It could also be an ans that makes me giv up on u ( nt as in giving up our frenship, but givin up to be with u). In Dilemma.

2009-06-28T07:28:00.000-07:00

i will Nv ever give up. i will wait, waiting patiently, just for euu.
i love u, crazy abt u.

2009-06-25T08:42:00.000-07:00

thursday~Wild Wild wet, so freaking tiring and worst of all, muscle cramps. acheing everywhere the next morning T.T, On tuesday, i stay up late caz after the swiming, i went to chong han birthday celebration. hahas!
, folo jun hong get some stuff xP after that, slack at home watch meteor garden... T.T so old le, but actually quite nice.
Today, went bbq, yah it was fun hahas :) but i keep having a very weird feeling. hahas its nt abt any of my frens or wad, its just myself xP i am weaken. Gd Bye...
In my heart, i always remember the answer u told me. Always stubborn, that i am, thinking foolishly that i might hav a tiny winny little small chance of getting close to u. however, i feel that i hav to face the truth 1 day. i understand that i am nt comparable to those frens of urs. i am nt saying they are bad, its just my wild imagination that i am being more far away from u, time to time. Yes, i reckon that i am jealous, i really am. it was my first ever time that i am of so much jealous. trust me, i have always been thinking of u, even in my dreams, or anywhere when i am daydreaming. i am seriously for the first ever time, deeping into some1. alot of my frens told bad stuff abt u, i really nv take it in. I just love u too much, till i am so crazy abt it... always awaiting a chance to even talk to u everyday, waiting all day long. I always try my very best to forget wad u said to me be4, and, being so thick skin that i could maybe hav a chance to be with u. However, till now, i never had a second answer from u, nt even a maybe... i had fallen finally, today, after much thoughts .oK, i blame myself that i am nt gd enough, seriously. But remember, i will nv blame u, as u are the 1 and only 1 that i love. i dont think i am able to hav any relation with any other girls in the world. seriously, as i cant giv my heart to any other 1 fully, as, no matter wad, i will still be thinking of u. Naaaa Hahas i am nt a gay and i will nv be a gay xP, its just that i understand something abt true love, thus making me loving u so much, to the core. trust me, i will nv forget u. Even 1 day, if u had a boyfren, i will still be at some place, at ur side, protecting u from any harm. I will do wadever i can for u, to make u happy. if u ever turn bad, i will do my very best to turn u back. i just wan to tell u, if possible, that i will be waiting for u, no matter how long, how far it takes, to hav a chance to be with u. maybe, just maybe, if 1 day u ever found a reliable person in ur life, i will seriously giv up on u. that will be when, i will really really try my very very ultimltly best to forget u and change my target. So for now, let me continue to be stubborn, to still believe that i will hav a chance with u. However, if u could giv me a very firm answer now whether i might hav a slightest chance to be with u, it may be gd. But, i really hoped that i will have a chance from u, as i can tell u, that my love for u, its true, and i believe, that i should be the 1 who love u the most in this world. I always wanted to prove to u how much i really love u... its just that luck is never on my side. i just couldnt, find a way to meet u face to face, to share my feelings to u 1on1. Sometime, my mouth couldnt even speak when i look at ur face directly. its just so pure and sweet, which made me so memorized by ur beauty, till i couldnt talk normally. Now that u had made alot of new frens, i do feel happy for u, seeing u being so happy everytime and having more exciting life with them. I hope that they will protect u, like how i am secretly, proving how gd u are to some of my frens, nt like wad they had thought of u. No matter wad negative feedbacks my fren say abt u, even wad stupid things u did be4, i will nv ever care abt it. I will only remember ur beauty and the kind heart u have, a little childish pranking but a lovely kind of u. Now i may not hav the chance to befrien and talk to u more than those frens of urs. I wish u will be happier without my bothering. Gd Bye, My lover...
Love Forever, Eternity...

anyway, i didnt plan to let ppl read abt this, as i felt that bottleing up my feelings is better nt only for me, but my frens, classmates too ,that i had. However, if any1 happen to read abt this, plz, dont gossip or say anything to any1. I hope that u all could keep it to urself. And worst of all, i hope no1 would accidentally talk abt this or me with her in front of me, As i hope that i could pass my day happily and carefreely... Thx x)
and this blog, i am sry, but i hav no reason to keep it alive anymore. I may blog again, 1 fine day, if i ever found out that i still, hav a chance with her, to hav interesting and fun things tgt, i may blog again. Its just that, i feel that my life wont be of any excitement without her. Du Bu Qi ... Zai Jian... da jia.

i will end with this...
Love hurts. If someone ask u whom would u prefer love? friendship? it's hard to choose right? It would be also hard for me, love because u can't tell her ur true feelings because u r afraid that ur friends might suffer, friendship because u have to sacrifice ur love just for friendship. :') be happy...

2009-06-19T20:59:00.000-07:00

Weather is getting hotter, even at night... cant slp at all sia. I keep flip here and there, for hrs T.T Maybe 1 day earth is going to explode due to hyper expandion from heat. LoL _ Our atmosphere, O3 is being reduced and converted to CO2. Therefore heat rays enter our mother earth easily... Omg i cant take it anymore. I ned My Air-con. Zzzz T.T morning forbid to use it, making me melting le... Ok i cant blog anymore today caz even my com is giving me trouble. Maybe it's also due to the heat? Lol -.-''' better stop thinking so much. Bye~~
i am a failure in love, espically abt u :''(

2009-06-19T00:26:00.000-07:00

harlo! yesterday, went badminton with fei fan and his frens. Our class gt me, nick and wei xian only T.T hahas played from 3pm to 5pm. afterthat, went home Rot...
today, wake up at 7am, game with nick till 10am. then so tired, nap till 3pm. ROAR!!! ZZZ waste lots of precious time. gona cry soon... Ok gtg gym at 6pm with griffin they all ^^. ByeBye~
u hav everytime i ned x)... luvb u very much xP

2009-06-17T07:42:00.000-07:00

I am Dead Beaten... Woahs!!! yesterday thought slp so early liao... Guess wad? Today latest in whole holiday, woke up -.-''' 4pm sia ZZzzzzzzzzz Planned to do hw at 9am. Wtf :( sadded. ok slack slack till 5pm, yong lun called me go ball... Canceled my hw period just to go ball with them. Reached at 7pm at 700+ basketball court. Me and yong lun first to reach there. Played ball, and hav 4v4 with some girls there and with randy they all T.T ok now seriously tired... Wo de Jiao Suan le... Gtg bye bye ~~
wanted to say, i love u

2009-06-16T06:51:00.000-07:00

Aiyo... Short post today, caz ned go take a small nap xP
Today went to Sentosa with my classmates, consist of --> leon, zhi guang, griffin, nick, jun hong, wei xian, noella, li ting, sze ling, eunice. Aiyo morning wake up and go makan, breakfast of guei chap at koufu. then go mac tabao breakfast for jq caz yesterday play till so late T.T forgt eat dinner -.-''' hahas. Left the food near door and go straight to boon lay inter meet. Go vivo slack awhile then go sentosa T.T aiyo went to siloso beach. go there play, enjoy the scene. in the end so tired then now straight came back home after dinner to take a small tiny nap. Bye!
i hate to break promises, thats y i will nv overslept today x), just for u... :')

2009-06-15T06:06:00.000-07:00

finally a day of slacking, quite normal today... looking forward for tmr's sentosa trip T.T I vow NT to touch that dirty water and play throwing sand games !!! Nv ever try that on me plz... no offense :( just dont wan dirty myself much. hahas xP buaiis~~
let me love u will u? i hate to say, but i wan u nia xP

2009-06-14T09:09:00.000-07:00

sunday~~
today woke up by louis's call... 1.45pm !!! wtf? agreed to meet at 2pm chiam liao lah T.T lucky he also just wake up so we postponed to 3pm. Meet at control station x) went to Jp saw carlisle and jun hong... Went kopitiam eat together :D eat le go walk walk loh... they decided to folo us. after they bought their things, me and louis gtg somewhere, so departed with them T.T gt our things then louis went home. Me leh? go jp slack slack here, slack slack there.
At night, go arcade play ball with hui ling and jing qi T.T so freaking tired... 2v1 me!!! my hand broked lols. then go play car hahas they keep banging de xP lucky i am fast Lolx =X then see an aunt change abt $20 just for the pushies game T.T in the end she failed to get it. Felt sad for her :( [however, to me, wad she did was like for sincerity? caz maybe she wanted to get it for some1... this kind of things $10 can get le.But spending time + effort + luck + eg.... = sincere bahs...] i was hoping she could get it T.T after that, went LJS makan. i left my hp on the table be4 i go buy my food. Then they took it -.-''' !!! but hahas i am nt even a slightest bit worried caz i knew the pphone is with them and they were those ppl who will nv ever steal xD 'trust' maybe? yea it is trust xD so i just wanted to went home. In the end saw Shu Chang ex basketballer ex jwss, my senior xD talk and talk at second floor jp. even the girls ate finish their food i still talking with him xD. He explained to me that he heard from my basketball junior that the BBQ is next friday T.T so sad for him to miss it as i could see he really wanted to go see our teachers T.T Aiyo he sure kana blamed for nothing xP hahas i cant help him much though ^^ before went home, saw pei ling[small sis] and shan shan [cousin] T.T borrowed my sis hp call MY hp hahas... ok no respond so gone home. reach home called my Hp then they told me go arcade again take back my phone xD hahas actually i could take back my hp next time caz i knew for experience that they will take care of the phone de... shall nt explain further =X go arcade play somemore thingy and Home Sweet Home x) hahas thats all today, Byes~~
happiest moment~ is with u =X hahas

2009-06-12T23:40:00.000-07:00

Sryz Guys, yesterday very late back hse hahas, somemore so tired, so didnt blog. oK yesterdays event hehe...
Morning, ok late morning i should say... 11.45am, eben msg me to remind me 12 noon meet him at Jp T.T Lucky he msg me if nt i sure to slp till 2pm xP. Went Jp for some wadever reasons :D after that go train control station wait my classmates... say 1 pm meet all later then us xD should actually go eat first T.T instead, we bought finger food eat nia. Nt full hehe I big eater mah. ok 1.45pm all ppl reach lei, consist of griffin, leon, zhi guang, me, eben, jasmine and last but 'the' least, the call me slp sanitiay... Train to bedok to take bus 197 to east coast. Wei xian and Noella both at east coast lei. Hahas Walked quite long and finally reach the Coast xP eat hokkian mee at there + sugarcane :) lols while buying my hokkian mee, my nose suddenly bleed. i thought wad sia like water come out my nose, then i go touch... ekks shi.t OmFg !@#$%^&* lols maybe the weather these days really too hot lei. Went to toliet wash wash T.T anyway east coast is fun bah? thought go there see leon cycle nia, but he in 1 single day learn to bike, is quite awesome eh? xD hahas caz he gt talent mah xPP aiyo then actually wan treat him a large coke but he bought some drinks lei so nvm give zhi guang they all drink. Hahas 6.20pm return eben's and my bike. eben and me left early caz he gt tuition and i gt bbq mah. so rush to bedok from bus... so long. at bedok train back boon lay more long ZZzzz. due to the heavy downpour, train reduces its velocity there ned more time to cover the same amount of distance. Physic eh? While on train, me eben talk abt alot of things =X and i also sms most of thie time hahas :') reach Jp folo eben buy his book for reading de then rush home change clothes and go BBQ... hahas BBQ funny loh eat eat eat and play play play. talk talk talk but in the end who clean the place? our juiniors of course xD hahas gt 1 time me wei long alvin hui heng playing with match sticks lols we light it and FIRE IN THE HOle. Guess whos the hole? actually didnt aim to throw on arron's head, wanted over it nia, but dono y the arc so sharp and stuck into arron's head !!!!!!!!! Lucky Gases i mean a little somke come out from his head. the lighted match stick extinguished half way in the air before reaching his head. Thus no fire hahas. We laugh like mad lols. Bascially the BBQ is for mdm tan's leaving ceremony, caz she is given a new challange [of another CCA] nt the reason of couldnt withstand basketballers xD hahas glad to hear that. Quite saded actually caz she had been with us for so long. Nvm, Cheer Up xD can go canteen find her whenever possible xP hahas.
After BBQ actually I tell Jun hui they all go SUPPER zzzz in the end they wan go safah Lan first... know wheres safah? Just beside my estate sia, and i donno T.T 'Wo Jiu Xiang Yi Ge Jing Di Zi Wa' hahas :P lucky play there 2h++ nia, nv ton there if nt i died T.T caz didnt tell my parents i late go home. Donno if they will anxious anot hahas :X first time Safah with jun hui, alvin, wei long, macky, shue jia, yong lun and arron was sure fun xD ok Wrote a compo lei... Gtg buaiis ~~
forever lovee...

2009-06-11T08:19:00.000-07:00

Aiyos today so damn tired T.T wake up so late at 2pm due to wadever reasons. T.T actually maybe can slp till 3 pm de, but 2pm wake up by mack lee xD Told me to go play Basketball 5v5 xP Then agree loh if nt stay at home rot meh? called jun hui to pass all msg to our beloved brothers caz he 'EX' caption ma. xPP hahas then go bath, fin those things lei and eat some fried chickens. Eat abit nia and jui hui so hardcore say at my hse btm lei T.T Had to rush le, nv eat finish my chickens -.-''' So kan jion for wad? In the end only me him and Alvin reach there first... Others all so late.
Played 5v5 two matches. Shocked that my skill nv deprove lols. won both games Hehe... But maybe caz juiniors tired as they had trainings during morning and afternoon before playing with us. Hahas so i am nt very proud that we beat them :D
After match, went makan at Nie canteen 2. Eat chicken chop, western foods. eat and talk talk loh. Late lei go back hse pub with frens. Hahas, then now i am here blogging. Gd nite~~

love u to the innerest most core xP

2009-06-09T23:54:00.000-07:00

Aiyo today so sianzz, like gt nthing to do. Morning eat slp, afternoon dota with wei xian try 2 new heros, the batman and the tauren chieftain... So funny lols. Aiyo maybe goin out eat eat soon ba... Bye~

2009-06-08T09:58:00.000-07:00

holiday's life is quite boring for me actually T.T During holidays, i tend to slp till or after 11 am in the morning. Maybe is becaz i slpt too late at night? Lols, even my hp also gave up on me. Alarm rang and i still hack care... snooze i also hackcare, everything i hackcare... In the end, slp till so late. Just like today, 1pm then wake up eat Lunch T.T Have decided changing breakfast for supper since sec 1 xD My mum often call me an owl, caz i always search my kitchen at night xP either find maggi eat eat or take money from dad go out eat T.T [ but seldom though xD] anyway, holiday is aka hw days. So get wad i mean? bye then :)

greatness thats u, dummy thats me, i am crazy abt u, a little gift, little time, little talk, little things, all the little somethings, are ur memories xD

2009-06-07T08:32:00.000-07:00

A sheer cold blizzard, and a heavy downpour. After it was a rainbow ;) Theres still Aftermath, but i should be able to withstand it T.T''' i hope so... Anyway, finalized, going for Lao Ben Tan chalet ^^ All BB gangs... I sure GG de... Worst, my sis goin too LoLs... aiyos dont care lei. Going slp ~~ nite xD

maybe now isnt the rite time... maybe u will forgt me by then, but u will always be in my heart ;) sry for my stubborness T.T i just cant let go. If u by a slightest chance hate it, i hope u can just let me be... hahas...

i am 'weird' seriously, towards u

2009-06-06T09:29:00.001-07:00

Harlo! today ~ normal day... Wake up at 8am, dont feel like waking up then drag till 12pm T.T its like i cant face the world hahas... Anyway went Jp eat eat, then tabao food to nicholas hse. Wei xian is there aready. Played at his hse, do lame stuff, then kelvin also come xD But in the end kelvin first 1 go home -.-''' nvm cant blame him caz his parents strict de. Played games on net, then type lots of bad word t.t''' Cybeer bully eh? hahas. Aiyo today is better than average ba, better than rottiong at home xD ok nite guys ~~

wake me up when september's gone...

2009-06-05T06:55:00.000-07:00

Harlos ;] today's blog maybe quite boring and lame to most ppl but for me, its quite serious? how put in a better word ar? the easier word 'formal' ba... xD If nt interested i aplogise first to u all ok? xD
TO all my frens who mistood abt me. Let me say this clearly, I am single and Really single. Dont believe me is urs problem. I dont know if u all are happy or sad abt this but i just want to make myself clear, i am nt a perfect person, just a plain normal average kid. I am nt Gd at anything stupid things, nt a cut. So plz dont ever bother the person that u all think i am with. Thx u guys...

darkest pit, definite elcipse, GG

2009-06-02T02:15:00.000-07:00

StressFul life. This Isnt holiday. Hell No xD anyway, i am glad i am still nt dead. Its' due to my frens. They are wad who makes life better and full of excitment hahas. Life is stress, yes i truly agree. However with frens, Even Impossible is possible de. My life will be black and white without them.
Today Skool's normal, just like my daily routine... Study, hw, Study, More hw. But I will persevere through this darkest hr.
After skool, bio Spa File work. Glad i complete all my correction. hahas x) ok bye~

love u always, it wont change. Jus let me be an ant :(

2009-05-29T05:56:00.001-07:00

Today is a Enjoyable day for me although Stressful. Y stressful? caz 3 days later is O level Chinese !!! GG man. Hahas but i will work hard nt only for myself, but for my caring and kind teachers for nt being sick of us [ the students], nv ever gave up on us, and puting their hopes on us. I will nt let my teachers down. Trust me xD.
after skool was the best xD due to the eating at Jp. it may be normal to most of u but to me, hahas i am sure happy. although we seems to be unable to make eye contacts [maybe caz of my stupidity and shyness] i was able to sit beside u. i dont understand y i am so nervous to even look at u. my flaws pulled me down in the end. so angry abt y just cant look at u directly and talk to u. Nevertheless, its a wonderful memory for me today. i will nv forget anything as long as it conserns u. :@ ~.~ hahas.
meet parent session. Omfg i still didnt improve alot. if this goes on, i am dead. maybe considering nursing? Jking of course lols. [nt insulting the nursing course hor :X peace ^^] there is still time. Thats wad i believe. I better start my work [study] now. BYe~~

loving u caring u...

2009-05-27T03:33:00.000-07:00

Whenever i see at u, my heart beat faster. I dono how to face u or talk to u. I cant start a conversation with u unlike my normal friends. Everytime i look at u, i tend to turn back away as i had a weird fear that u may saw me looking at u. I really really want to talk to u very much, but i just cant due to some facter before that u said to me... I am lieing if i say i am fine abt it. i am hurt now. theres no path in my life anymore. no lights and colours... its just black and white, plain and simple. i cant forget u. I am sry abt thiis but i really cant after so long. nvm dont say anymore lei caz u will get stress abt this. however everytime when i secretly see u, i had a smile in my heart. Every1 may thought that i am a pervert [ yes i am! hahas just jokin xP ] but seriously seeing u makes my day. There is no chance for me to get close to u but i really, still , really, really, really, really X 10.......... wan be with u. Nvm i am just a failure T.T

today aiyo okok ba. simple and easy life. No fun, no laughter, just daydreaming abt the princess that 1 wanted... lets stop being -.-''' abt this. Skool life -- intensive chinese... i dont mind killing my brain cells just to do practice papers. i just hope that the hard work i, no every1 put, will pay off. i had no 1 to believe now except for my teachers. let my future be in their hands, bony and skinny hands. xD tmr is another pp 1 omfg Gd luk to me and myself and all my friends. Jia yous!

say i am shy, i dont care as i really am, but 1 thing i will nv be shy abt is 'my love for u' i hope u dont know who i am refering to as u would tell me to giv up. I am sry, i cant. U can just take me as a log and hackcare abt me. maybe u will feel better that way.

2009-05-25T06:26:00.000-07:00

Aiyo... gt back all papers lei. All nt gd, no outstanding results but only below average results T.T anyway now i still hav to prepare for my eng oral + chinese paper 1 mok exam... zzz shouldnt have slept till now. Wtf lols... nvm, i can just forget about slping today -.-''' Gd bye ~~

2009-05-24T01:03:00.000-07:00

A week had passed. It seems that i just couldnt get back my confidence. No mood to talk cok with frens, and feeling so different. i just couldnt focus on my chinese now T.T Just feeling weak ba. everytime feel like sleeping, wake up, slp, take book, slp. i just cant face it. I hope i could maybe start my chinese preparation tmr. Hope there is a change of feeling in my heart for me to focus on study.

2009-05-21T08:47:00.000-07:00

today script checking day 1... gt 3 days in all including monday next week. Did seriously Bad with deprovement. I better bulk up now!!! i dont want this kind of results for my O level. Basically passed E-math , chem, bio just borderline, and failed ss by 2 marks... Wtf man... it seems that my hard work is nt hard enough thus it didnt pay off. i will make sure i will have a good timetable for my Hell june holidays. better nt think of slacking anymore lei. xD Bye~~

2009-05-20T03:04:00.000-07:00

Wed~
Gt back some MCQ questions' answer. Did badly for Bio and Phy. In less than 2 weeks is Chinese O level examination. Siaaa lah... Cham liao lah... Better start my preparation soon. O level exam so mus nt siao siao le. So will pause blogging for a short period of time till that Exam day is over. T.T
Anyway, wish Alvin Toh from Basketball a sweet happy birthday. though it should be yesterday but no time to blog due to certain wadever reason. Haha 16 lei leh ^^ meaning more matured maybe? So when do things must start putting more effort [ nt saying u didnt put in 100%] but must learn to Put more than 100% xD espically study hor ok? Gt problems can ask me as when i have problems i sure ask u de hahas.
OkOk gtg ... Bye~~

2009-05-18T02:42:00.000-07:00

Today seem so different. Its nt like before anymore T.T Further more Chinese O level is coming soon. 2 week. But i am feeling so crushed. 1 week, i should be able to be back to normal ba... needed so time to sort things out. Anyway, just went to see Leon. He is ok now after an operation xD hahas though he cant laugh that much now as it may affect his wound. And he had gt a 3 weeks Mc. Well, he said he will be back after a week's break. After visiting him, our class went for badminton at frontier jurong library. Quite Gd barhs, i am able to relax abit of my mind now. Ok gtg Slp lei, so damn tired after so many things occuring. Bye~~

2009-05-17T08:32:00.000-07:00

Day by day, the flame in my heart is dimmishing. today seemed worst? As i know, i am nt perfect too. Thus i hav always been quite unsuccesive most of the time. As far as i know, i hate losing. Nt games but reality things. Family, relatives, teachers, teammates, friends, classmates and most of all "loveones in my live". Finally i hav been crippled. I feel lik i cant move on anymore? Life seems so bad at times. But i myself know that life is nt perfect. I dont believe in gamble as i always lose[ lack of luck maybe?] nor bet. Thx for the truth and i really appciate it. I will be stronger and Move on. Time is nv waiting. Now i seriously need some space to reflect, and to calm my little self, just a small little time for me to be back to normal. i can of course control my emotions as i am big enough, but my body is just shutting down. my mind is pretty blank now. Seemed no any direction or path for me to choose. No any thinny winni chances... I am tired, real tired now... Let me rest for some days and i may be normal again. Hahas ;D

From wad i know abt myself, my choice will nt change. I am a person, weird maybe? but i only go for the choice i wan. i would giv it all my best shot even if there is no slightest chance. Stupid maybe?yea somethings when i think, its really stupid but thats me, as i am true and seriously true. The words i said was nv a lie. when i am true towards u, i am really only thinking about u. Mad or wad, how can it be possible? but i do know that its bad to play with ppl's heart therefore i will only hav that choice. No matter how weakly my flame is burning, if the flame is still nt put out, I will nv ever giv up! I promise i will just wait, wait and wait for that 1 fine little day to come. If it nv come, i will still move on with my own stupid thoughts, thinking that that day would surely come. I dont care wad other ppl tell me or how they discriminate u, but to me, u are just the u. Nth i say now will change my life now... just let me rest for awhile. Feeling so upset that i am. Hahas i still can laugh though, but it may nt be that real laugh from before. Dont say i am Emo as i am just bottling up my feelings so that i dont show people how weak i really am.
Ok haha it seems that i have written a compo Lols -.-lll i will continue tomorrow bahs~ Gd nite

2009-05-15T21:26:00.000-07:00

HarloS Long time No 'See' lols xP Yea! finnally my first nightmare is over hehe. though i hav 3 nightmare this year, it seems that i hav pass 1 lei. Gd job Gd job xD BUT!!! second nightmare coming soon T.T nvm ba, caz as people grow, they hav to learn to go though more and more stress. thus, all this little setback... wont make me lose confidence. I know some subject like for instance, A math paper 1, GG hahas... Felt sad due to always letting my gd teachers down... i hate making them sad as they really put in alot of efforts. Its just my own problem... I should hav be more hardworking T.T ~~ okok stop being emo Like Idiot lei hahs xD I will work will 110% from now on... NO 110000000000000000000, 0 digit recuring, infinite till i drop. I promise i will at least get A2 for A math zzzz I WILL PROVE IT!

Exam Life ~
nt bad darhs... everyday sleep at maybe 2 am? wake up at 5am to revise wad i have learnt, then go skool meet hell loh. However when i know that i did real well for some subject, it really motivate and build up my confidence, telling me nt to be sad on wad i did badly, but to move on and Aim higher next time. Learn from mistake is the most important thing hahas. Said this caz haha sure lots of mistake wad lols -.-lll everyday is just so stress. Workload seems so much. maybe i didnt start the revision early ba... next time must at least 1 month+ before. BUT there are really some gd advantage during exam period, mainly go skool take test then go home lei, like so gd, no ned sit in class so long --- how i wish everyday would be like that. Anyway i better stop dreaming and stop always thinking abt peaceful and relaxful life. Ok back to topic, 1 last ,,, best advantage is that, u will actually feel lighter as every single days passes. And Best of all, during the last day, before that exam, u will feel like giving everything u hav, dont care about sleeping and just study "after exam come back can recupate back those hrs of slp wad"^^ thats wad i always told myself inorder to push myself hahas. Anyway exam is over now, though it is abit lighter now, but i still hav the eurge and feeling to study more suddenly. Quite PumB up eH? it should be the work of constant focus test that makes us constantly studying ;)

YesTerDay~
Yeah! thats my last exam day. Gd man! Can Chile abit 'only abit hor' lei xD went Gym with michael, giffin, louis. Others PS us... say wan come then 'PROOF' disappear into thin air... nvm lahs haha somethings only xD relax relax we wont be inmature and scold u all xD Ok after Gym, kana Death pursuade by griffin... Unable to reject him lols... then just go there last minute loh. Meet at golden village [for those who donno, its a village in a rural area in Singapore which is GOLDen in colour ^^] HEHE! gt evelyn, griffin, nick`gou`la`si, sze ling, satay, jue yi and krystal. thought watch Angels & Demon. found out we watching X men Orgins after we go in and i check my sit T.T BUT!!! LEt me say first --> The Show is Awesome xD i like it alot. Nt bad Nt bad hahas. Fantastic lols. really if any1 go see, i can asure u that u will feel that the 2hr+ u spend is worthwhile de ^^ Watch abit lei go act go toliet go do something, but in the end didnt get to see " ". hahas nvm nvm xD then no choice then gone back into threater finish the awesome show xD After the show, slack and tok ccok in jp for awhile. hahas Any1 follow our class ppl do things SUre Get Influenced xD finally gone home on com, touch touch awhile and Sweet dreams finally.... Gt up at 11am today haahs 12 hr slp T.T xD

2009-05-03T05:32:00.000-07:00

Sat ~ every sat or sun early morning, first thing Dota with nick at 6am till 10am xD. Afternoon when to library to study till 4-5 with jun hong, evelyn, debbie, wan ying & sze ling. came only at 2 and study 2hr only cannot take it lei... Decided to go eat prata Downstair. After that went home slp and rot...
Sun ~ today prove so much that i am really a slacker and lazy bum. Slp till 1pm afternoon. Do daily stuff, eat and slack till 4pm. Then study only for maybe 30 mins? Zzz shouldnt study on my bed man -.-''' suddenly very sleepy... & cannot take it. So took a NAP of 4hr 30min till 8.30pm zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. I SWEAR I Will FINISH my PhySic TOday -.-''' GtG study!!! MIA for sure now. No more bloggin till after MYE. bYe~~

Nv say Die In Front of ur Books -.-lll wTf xD ~

2009-05-01T03:20:00.001-07:00

HEh ... Exam period so i will be posting lesser. Dont Blame Me TeeHe xD !
~ Wed ~ Eng exam. Paper 1 i dont even know wad i am writing -.-lll Paper 2 compre was so hard -.-lll Welll, gd luk to my eng results.
~ Thurs ~ Chinese exam. Paper 1 was Ok ba. able to write alot of crap, so maybe can do well. However paper 2 was a killer ZZZzzz... the whole 1 half hr donno reading wad... Now i am nt sure whether i am a chinese T.T
Decided to slack and rest for a while. Met jun hui, mack, shue jia, yong lun, chong xun, arron at bernard's mum wake. Go there accompany him lols. At there SO much foood. I wasnt full after first serving -.- N decided to ask for second... then his aunt take so much for us. In the end, the amt of food was like Mountain lah. Beee hoon stack till so high, but nice N curry so Tasty!! xD
But really so much then jun hui they all blame me for calling. They even say they will help me by playing 'open number' which shue jia and jun hui know how to count and cheat, therefore always i kana chosen to eat those food. Zzz All also i eat 1, make my stomach bloated --> better do more situps everynite -.- After that we went to Jp. They follow me go Fairprice Extention buy 'Things'. Then after that shue jia go ****** buy voka. Smart Seh him xP after that, went around my estate to slack, play com n drink our stuff we bought. Play till 11pm lols.
~ Fri ~ Rotting ------ at home nowwwwww -.-lll

2009-04-28T02:48:00.000-07:00

Tues ~ Gd Gd lucky my things nt stolen xD. Somemore today 2.00 go home lei so gd :) Eat with nick, mack & sui sheng in skool canteen before go home. Then suddenly it rain again. 3 time today lols ~ first 5++ am the rain, second after recess & third after skool -.-lll I blame the rain for making the weather so cold and cause me to take a nap till 6pm... Zzz Nevertheless, i really like rain caz i can combo with rain to make thunder storm? JKJK lols... but i do like rain as it makes the weather so nice, cooling, slow pace xD. Okz Tmr MYE english Pp so Gtg Bye~~ and nt posting for a period of time... sRy xD

p/s : hahas treat me eh? xD

2009-04-27T07:19:00.001-07:00

Monday ~Bad Day~ First got back Chem Test Pp... From now on, Any1 call me smart or wad, i make sure i 'kill' that person.
Next, Theif atk our class once again. Stfu my things also wan zzz Asshole theif... If i ever caught him GG to him. My Ferro Rocher for **** **, he also Steal. WTF! Nvm Zzzz next time i better be more careful... And I bought a Bigger 1 HehE lolSxxx, thought nt the Dark choco 1...
Third ~ bernard's mum pass away... T.T i hope deeply from my heart that he will still be fine... I know this is very hard for him as i experience something worst than his before. Nevertheless, Life stills goes on. Time will nt wait for us. Brace urself forward n Nv giv up urself hor xD. Let me tell u... U still Hav US ur brothers. If u ned some1 to talk to, just tell us and we will gladly help u. Try nt bottle up ur feeling. U will feel worst... Trust me as we will help u de! hahas~
Lastly ~ gone to his mum funeral. Suai sia -.-lll while walkin there, yong lun's shoe strip broke -.-
Hav to go back his hse change. The Witches sure is making some ritual today T.T...
Went there so late lei. Saw mdm tan, mrs arzenni and mrs lim. Class 4e3 were there too. My basketball Senior are also there hahas. Today seem to be a real suky day. However, its gd to see bernard lookin pretty fine. [thought he is sure damn sad...] tell me who will nt be depress if their parent is suddenly gone? So From Now on, I... no We the brothers of him will accompany him more often when he come back to school... hahas

~In life, there is always gd and bad. No matter how hard u fall, be strong and stand up again. This is also a form of growing... Nv giv up and most importantly, be brave and accept the fact. There will always be some1 caring abt u ~

2009-04-26T02:10:00.000-07:00

Friday ~ school seem so fast... no focused test, no Chinese lesson, no extra remedial, No Anything xP went Jp eat eat with griffin, li ting, nick, sze ling eg eg... Lols eat so long caz talk alot primary skool stuff. Reach home at 3 and donno y so tired, slp till 9 watch the show with lame opening music ! The Ping Pong reachin climax lei haha.

Sat ~ basically very bored, rotting at home. At nite watch ghost movie but nt scary 1...

Sun ~ today haha go cut my Long Hair ... In the end cut like nv cut like that. But gt abit difference liao ba. Hope wont get caught by teacher. Bought 3 new assessment, + last time buy 1 total gt 9bk lei zzzz. Nv even start doin yet T.T Better start soon ~~ Bye!

2009-04-23T04:00:00.000-07:00

Today feeling fine... Pe Woots, first time do 7 pull up lols. Finally can relax as Nafa test is over lei.
A math test T.T''' cant seem to see the 2 triangle. donno wad my mind is thinkin, simple question also cant do. SIao liao lah better study hard from now on.
Stayed in skool till 6.30 to do hw. So tiring zzz. Now reach home still ned study tmr's social study test. Very Sianz. Ok gtg study lei buaai bye!

focus study first ! then u xP

2009-04-22T07:35:00.000-07:00

yea... today seems a better day. 2 free periods, best of all no test. Chinese test GG t.T nt. I did nt manage my time well ... Well, i will try harder next time. Ok gd luk to myself abt tmr's Nafa test, and gd luk to my frens. Hope u all will get ur desire target!
Gt a new hp W395 sony ericsson. Quite nice and easy to use. Haha xD
MYE is getting near. Prepare now or it will be too late...

2009-04-21T02:44:00.000-07:00

Confusion... Stress... Sadness... Tired... Failure... Better stive hard now or it will be too late -_-"
Gd Luk to myself haiss...

MYE -> revision start now!!!

2009-04-20T04:40:00.000-07:00

Skool day! Quite ok... the chinese listening compre is maybe average? Donno if can do very well for it anot ;( However today there is a lesson meaningful and funny xD Our class had to Shout 'I am confident!' loudly... It really seems quite funny but i do gt the truth intention of this. I do feel that my confident is back suddenly.
From now on i shall be confident on wad i wan to do in order for me to be successful.Haha...

confident is the key to success~